Our Trip to See Anni, Ella, Karli & Elin

Jan 31 & Feb 1, 2013

While Daddy was at the Super Bowl in New Orleans, we went to Annapolis to see our dear friends!!! It was a special trip. We had a blast. John Henry made friends with Elin, who is about to be one. Hudson played with Ella - they pick up right where they left off as always. Its beautiful! Karli played a lot with Hudson and Ella. The kids got to sled and had a ball. Anni and I got to catch up and even got to go out one night for dinner and drinks and her sweet Mom came with us. Brad watched all the kids and scored major points with us Moms. A great trip!

Anni and Ella are Here for Thanksgiving!! Weekend!

Nov 24, 2012

Ella's grandparents live in Darien. They are here for 5 days visiting. We met them at The Maritime Aquarium in Norwalk, CT. Then, we ate lunch in Darien. It's always awesome to see our dear friends. I love seeing Anni and I miss her. She is the closest friend I made from Dallas and a dear friend I'll always have! Ella is your oldest friend and you all will always have your special connection. I realized today that you and Ella met when you were Henry's age now, 4 months.

The funny thing is, you and Ella are so similar! She is a tom boy. She climbs everything like you do and you are both rambunctious!!

You and Ella are 4 and Karli is 3.

Xoxo Mamma

Hudson's Front Tooth and The Dentist

August 2012

Hudson,

The first day I came home from the hospital after having John Henry, the veneer on your front tooth fell out. As if we didn't have enough going on- We were new to Old Greenwich, we were in a new house, we had a new baby. You were running around the house playing with Ella and Karli (Anni came to visit), and you ran into Brad and your veneer fell out.

Let me explain. When you turned 3, I took you to the dentist for your first routine teeth cleaning. It turned out that your front tooth had an abscess, much to my dismay! You had to have it removed and while you were under they took an impression of your teeth and made an appliance (veneer) and put it in. You never even knew you had it and you never even knew you had surgery. So you were freaked out when it fell out. You had no idea what had happened and it scared you. Ella thought it was cool because losing a tooth means you are getting older. You were crying and upset and I was already hormonal and I was so upset too!

To make a long story short. I finally found a dentist and your teeth had already moved. They could not put the original appliance back in, so he was going to make a new one. You completely freaked out when he tried to make an impression of your teeth- you were crying and scared. He couldn't do it. I felt horrible for putting you through it! He said, "Look, he doesn't have to have this done. This is an aesthetic thing at his point. He can go without a front tooth until the other one grows in." I had to put all my feelings aside and realize this is about my baby! Not me! It was just hard to see your beautiful smile lose a tooth and know it would be years before another tooth would grow in. So, that's the story of your front tooth being gone very early. People walk up to you now and say, "Wow, you already lost a tooth!" And now, I think you're smile is freaking more adorable than ever and you are more handsome than ever and I would not change it! It's so no big deal and you will get your permanent tooth soon enough. My sweet Hudson, this is the perfect story for you - you always take the road less traveled. You are only a little boy once. I love you handsome! Mamma

Hudson and His Oldest Friend, Ella

Today, Anni, Ella ad Karli came to the club with us. They are in Darien, CT visiting Brad's parents so they came to see us! We love and miss them so much and it's always so special to see them. You and Ella have a very special friendship Hudson. You love and care about one another and it's so sweet! She thinks you are hilarious and laughs at everything you do, which you love. She gets you and always has. How is this possible at 4? I'm not sure, but she just gets you. You all met in Dallas and have been friends since you were 4 months old. Today, Ella told you, "Hudson, I am going to marry you." Have you ever heard anything more innocent, precious and sweet? You replied, "Oh no! I'm never getting married!" Too funny. Oh Hudson, how that will change! How that will change my love! You told me, "Mamma, Ella said she loves me." I said, "Well, tell her you love her too," and you said, "I love you too and I have missed you Ella." So beautiful!

Kisses, Mamma

Anni & Ella's Visit to Dallas 3-31-11

Hudson, my Hud (that's what Ella says),

Hudson, we had the most special visitors this weekend, our best friends - Anni and Ella. We had the best time. They left this morning and we both miss them so much! They had to leave this at 6am - you were still asleep. Anni and I were warning you and Ella last night so that you would not be surprised and upset when you woke up this morning. You woke up and said some things, and then finally said, " Where are Anni and Ella?" I said, "They had to leave baby. They got on a big airplane this morning." You said, "I am going to go check to see if they are gone." You went in the bedroom that they had been staying in. I could have cried. You had a look of sadness, but picked your head up and went about your business.

I have to tell you about the first 30 minutes with them because it has to do with how passionate and big your heart is Hudson. I think you loved and missed Ella so much your heart could have exploded and you didn't know how to put it all into words. Just the fact that she lives in another city now and she has been gone. You were trying to wrap your head around it. You are a thinker. So, we went to the airport to pick them up and we were waiting outside in our. Anni and Ella came out and I said, "There they are!" You had a smile and they walked up to the car and I was so excited and gave them big hugs. You went into shut off mode. I had talked to you about this before they came to the car. I told you that I knew you were excited, and I had been preparing you for the visit for about a 5 days (I did not tell you before that because it would have been too long a wait and toddlers like instant gratification). I said, "Baby, be nice and say 'how are you', 'I have missed you'." I knew you would go in shut off mode and I was a little worried. You basically lost it. I say, "Anni and Ella are here!! Say hi." You start whining and crying, "No. No!! I don't want to say hi." You went on and on and I tried to ignore it. We all did. Anni and Ella love you so much and know you so well. They have seen this many times before. This is basically the same drill we go through every time you see Ella. You shut down because you love her so much and are so excited to see her, you just don't know what to do, how to act or what to say. Ella, sweet baby girl, is such a great, loyal friend to you. She loves you so much Hudson. She knows your personality and tells you to snap out of it basically. She is like, "Come on Hudson. Hudson, oh Hudson," waiting for you to snap out of your funk. All of a sudden after about 30 minutes (you went to your room you cried, you were saying NO), you walk up to Anni, give her the biggest hug and say, "Hi, how are you? I missed you!" Oh, my love, my Hudson. You have such a passionate, big heart, there is so much love in it and I think it is hard for you to put it all into words and deal with it at times. You just shut down, but you always always come around. It's ok that it takes you a bit sometimes. Your Mamma is just the same. As long as you do not say anything mean or disrespectful. Mamma does not like that at all.

You and Ella played, watched TV and snuggled, jammed out, went to the park, ran in the sprinklers, wrestled on the trampoline and just had a ball. It warmed our hearts just watching you all. Hudson, Ella is a very special little girl. She is beautiful and bright and she understands you. She, like all girls, is a flower (I always tell you that girls are flowers and boys are tough and that you play differently with girls than you do with boys), but Ella is tough. She can take care of herself, just like her mommy. she wrestled with you on the trampoline for so long. I mean you were pulling her down by her shirt and she was laughing and getting right back up. There are not a lot girls who could play with you like that. She's tough and I love it. So do you! Yo all had the greatest time on the trampoline. You were like two puppies and Anni, Daddy and I were soaking it up, having the best time watching how sweet you all were laughing and playing.

You and Ella have a very very special connection. It is visceral, sweet and pure. I think you all truly love one another. The first night you all were watching in TV on our bed and I caught the most special moment. You laid your head in her lap, and she said, "Hudson, you are glad I am here, aren't you?' You said, "Yes I am, I love you." Oh My God. It was the sweetest most precious thing I had ever seen! Like little adults, not 3 year olds!

Anni and Mommy are special friends too and maybe this is why you love Anni and Ella even that much more. It was so fun to see her and catch up. We got to drink some wine and chat the night away every night. Mommy misses her so much. She is a true friend, a real friend. She was the best friend that I had made here in Dallas and she had to move away. But, it doesn't matter the distance, we will always be close to her and Ella

Hudson, you love Anni so much. I have never seen you take to any Mother like that. You run up to her, hug her, kiss her and tell her you love her, you did it all weekend. Anni said you were the sweetest little boy with the biggest heart she has ever met. She gets you too, even when you go in shut down mode.

We are lucky to have Anni and Ella. They are true friends and true friends don't just come around everyday. You are lucky if you can count on one hand the truly close friends in your life. The ones that would do anything for you and stand by you through thick and thin. Anni and Ella are counted on that hand. Friends like Anni and Ella are friends you cherish, respect and nourish.

Hudson, it is hard for you to come to grips with your feelings at moments, but you always get there and face them at some point and I am so proud of you. I always talk with you about it later. I ask you how you were feeling and why. I want you to always be able to talk about your feelings with me because I love you, you are my heart, and whatever it is, I will understand. It always feels better to get it out. If you feel like you are shutting down, walk away for a bit, collect your thoughts, take three deep breaths, and come back and face them. Always come back and face your feelings, because if you don't, they will haunt you. They do not just vanish. I know this from experience. Face your fears my love.

I love you my sweet boy, Hudson

two quotes to think about amore:

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." -FDR

"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." - John 8:32

"Never let the fear of striking out get in your way." -Babe Ruth